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Building and Maintaining Relationships while the kids are small

By: Marianne Jimenez-

Have the kids taken over intimacy? Do you struggle to set aside “we time”? Let’s face it, once the baby is born – life becomes all about them. Studies show that 67 percent of couples see a plunge in satisfaction post-baby. So, what are we proactively doing to counter this statistic? You might ask yourself, is there anything we can do to recover the many days spent running behind the kids and the many nights spent with toddlers sleeping in our beds… 


I’m here to tell you, YES! There is hope; it is possible to reignite the flame.  

It starts with informing yourself, recognizing and accepting that this is a normal stage of life and that it takes action.

Okay, you are ready to take action – how do you ask?


  1. Communicate with each other openly and honestly.

  • Voice your concerns and expectations warmly and lovingly
  • Talk to your partner about your fantasies and desires.
  • Be open to listening to your partner’s feedback.


      2. Experiment and make it light.

  • Have an open mind and try new things you both enjoy –
  • bring enthusiasm and novelty into the bedroom.
  • Explore each other and build closeness for extended periods before engaging one another.


     3. Nurture intimacy.

  • Incorporate your mind, body, and spirit.
  • Keep these words in mind: love, passion, devotion, affection, understanding, morals, kindness, trust, romance, desire, closeness, nurturing, wanting, value, sex, gratitude, priority, dating, invest, belonging…


     4. Prioritize yourself.

  • Your physical and emotional well-being is vital.
  • You have to feel good so that others feel good around you.
  • Practice mindfulness with deep breathing techniques and meditation.


All relationships change over time! To foster desire and connection, consider the various experiences and challenges you and your partner have faced at different points in your lives – embrace and adapt.


Lastly, if you are struggling or having issues in your relationship, consider making an appointment with a couple’s therapist. We can provide a safe, supportive, unbiased, and nonjudgmental healing space for you to share your concerns. Contact us today.

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